A cloud of Weltschmerz ( depression or apathy caused by comparison of the actual state of the world with an ideal state, or a mood of sentimental sadness) has been over my head for sometime, on again and off again. Though the original meaning refers to world out there, I am using the term within the context of my own world. The ideal state in this context being what I thought where I would be in life at this stage of life and it is way past for any course correction. It is not like I had a limited repertoire of choices to make in my life, I had aplenty of choices to make and I did make them too. At this stage in my life as I reminisce my past, I wondered why the weltschmerz. A friend, one whose grasp of vocabulary is something I admired quite a lot, recently mentioned about a new word she came across – uhtceare. As I was looking for the etymology and background for the word, I came across a site that listed the author’s top ten list of forgotten words and one of the words in the list was ultracrepidarian. Thus I may have found the answer to why the weltschmerz.
Sutor, ne ultra crepidam is a Latin expression meaning literally “Shoemaker, not beyond the shoe”, used to warn people to avoid passing judgment beyond their expertise. The expression led to the term ultracrepidarianism, which is the giving of opinions and advice on matters outside of one’s knowledge.
Its origin is set down in Pliny the Elder’s Naturalis Historia, where he records that a shoemaker (sutor) had approached the painter Apelles of Kos to point out a defect in the artist’s rendition of a sandal (crepida from Greek krepis), which Apelles duly corrected. Encouraged by this, the shoemaker then began to enlarge on other defects he considered present in the painting, at which point Apelles advised him that ne supra crepidam sutor iudicaret (a shoemaker should not judge beyond the shoe), which advice, Pliny observed, had become a proverbial saying. You can read more about it here.
What if I was that shoemaker, who thought of himself beyond making shoes. Though I may have many pairs of shoes, the total collection being less than the individual pairs. That could explain why I feel the gap between what I have and what I thought I would have, despite not being a “one trick pony”.
For example, these four pictures illustrate my point of view. The fourth one being sum total of first three and is less than each one of them.
The first three in the above are sharp enough though may be lacking some details and could represent each of my shoes (career, personal life, hobbies etc). The sum total as defined by where am I in terms of my aspirations can be seen in the fourth one and it is less than each of the three. Perhaps an exaggerated assessment of self success? Perhaps a misplaced notion of self capability? Perhaps an overstatement of self skills? Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps……
